Posted by: Andy | January 8, 2005

Portland ho!

Not like we were sailing or anything – but it’s always funny to put “ho” at the end of a sentence. Right? Seriously…I’m fucking hilarious right? I need social justification for existence! AHHHHH.


Anyway…Portland (OR) is fucking beautiful. Trees for days, clean air and a population density low enough to make Santa fart – my kind of place. True, we haven’t had any snow yet – maybe my opinion of it will change then – but probably not.

The move itself was fun – 8.5 hours from LA to Sacramento, driving through about 150-200 miles of heavy fog in 24 foot moving truck is enough to make my left foot stone paranoid. By the end of the thing it was seeing “another” foot. Claiming that there was a near mirror image of it always in the distance, off to the right. Then we chilled in Sacramento with the wife’s family for xmas, then hit the rest of the drive the Monday morning after. It was 16ish hours from Sacramento to Portland – but about 2 hours of that was holdover in Redding while we waited for the snow to cleared on the pass. It really didn’t feel that long though – maybe because we were so excited to get the FUCK out of that Loose Asshole.

The house is great, although freaking cold right now. It has this archaic furnace thing in the middle of the carpeted basement. Very …I dunno, funny. It used to be a sawdust furnance in the 20s or something and they converted it over. I’ve already fallen down the attic stairs once. Good times! Mostly just because I have issues placing my feet one before the other. My left keeps crazily veering off for some reason. Need to get it some prozac or something.

Took over a week to get the phone hooked up…some kind of short in the wiring. And don’t get me started on the fucking DSL – I can’t believe how mentally deficient AT&T’s phone service people are. OK. They are probably not brain damaged, they just happen to have really poor English, making it nigh impossible for me to explain anything more complicated than “Yes.” or “No.” I eventually just told them to fuck off (after a week and a half) and drove down to comcast and picked up a modem. Lo and behold it was working the next day. Oh, and guess what – Comcast phone CSR people are all in the US or Canada. Kudos, seriously. In a time when everyone is outsourcing to cheap semi-bilinguals in India, it is a breath of fresh air to hear an understandable voice on the other end.

Oh. And On Demand cable is the shit! About as cool as DVR/Tivo. Too bad the DVR unit we have isn’t the best – only one ff/rw speed. Seriously – these two together are how TV was meant to be watched. I actually use it once and a while now.

Back to job hunting. Before we starve to death!



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